


Sick Bagels

by newt_scamander



Category: Workaholics (TV)
Genre: Bagels, Gay, Gen, M/M, Mostly porn, NSFW, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, babes, blake is a major cutie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-01
Updated: 2016-05-01
Packaged: 2018-06-05 14:55:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6709486
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/newt_scamander/pseuds/newt_scamander
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Showers and bagels, man. And a sham wow, but like, for your hair.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sick Bagels

**Author's Note:**

> Girlfriend got me into Workaholics and I have hardly stopped watching.

The alarm clock beeped but Anders Holmvik was already awake. He hit the off button with his foot and wiggled back into the correct form on his pull up bar. He did another set, dropping to the ground. Then he used the obnoxiously orange sweatband to mop up the sweat on his forehead. After a moment he gave it up as a bad job and tossed it aside. He could just shower. 

He grabbed the freshly pressed dress shirt and wrinkle free tie before heading down the hall to the bathroom. Or that was the plan. 

When he left his bedroom he noticed the overwhelming smell of salmon cream cheese, an odor he usually associated with Montez and fear. But he walked into the kitchen, draping his post-shower clothes over the back of the couch as he went. 

"Blake, what the flamenco are you doing?" Anders asked. 

"I'm doing uh- well, I'm doing bagels. Yeah. Bagels. Alice said I sucked and I need to be prepared if ever Jillian calls out." Blake explained, smearing egregiously pink cream cheese on a charred bagel. "Look, I'm getting better at cream cheese. Our toaster might be broken." 

"Yeah. Adam tried taping it to his face to get heat vision and then it fell off the roof." 

"Oh. Right. I'm gonna nuke it. It'll get pizza flavoring too. That's how microwaves work." Blake decided, stacking plain bagels on a styrofoam plate and sliding them haphazardly into the microwave. He punched a couple buttons on the keypad and stepped back. "Pizza and salmon. Probably Alice's top 15 flavors on a bagel." 

"Are there really fifteen things people would be eager to eat on a bagel? I think bagels are best left plain." 

"Are you kidding me? The Hogi mart two blocks over has like 18 different kinda of bagels. And the cream cheese section? Mind blowing." 

Anders rolled his eyes. "Alright, Blake." 

"Here. Eat like twelve. I've got eighteen bags of bagels." Blake tossed him a bag of toasted bagels. "I'm sure they're delicious and you're welcome." 

Anders caught the bag. "Thanks man. Breakfast on the- well, the go. The go to the shower. Karl isn't here is he?" 

"No. He's in like- Indiana or something." 

Anders nodded. "Good. Good, I needed to make sure. He makes fun of my hair. Well, my towel. He doesn't appreciate what it does." 

"Hair hat man, I feel you. I've got one of those sham wow things, but like for your head? You feel?" 

Anders nodded. "Totally." 

Blake got the bagels out of the microwave. "Go shower. You smell funky." 

"I was working out on the pull up bar." Anders huffed. "This is man stink, Blakey bear." 

"Sure sure. It's muddling with pizza-salmon bagel, so get out." 

Anders rolled his eyes, walking down the hall. 

He had only just turned on the water and hung his clothes up on the towel rack to steam any wrinkles out. He heard the door open, turning around. "How long were you going to pretend you didn't want to get in here?" 

Blake shrugged, untying the bandana from his head. "Adam was camping out on the couch you know? He wiped mustard on your shirt."

"I thought that was semen honestly so I'm glad it was just mustard." Anders pulled the sleeveless tie dye shirt over Blake's mane and yanked him forward. "Kinda hurt my feelings. Like you just want me for my bagel tasting finesse." 

Blake rolled his eyes, stepping forward. "You have no idea how to accurately describe a pizza salmon bagel." He shook his head and pulled him closer. "Just make out with me." 

"Gladly." Anders nodded, kissing him deeply. Blake lifted himself up, his skinny little legs wrapping around Anders' waist. Anders pressed him against wall, kissing him desperately and pawing at his pants. "Shower?" 

Blake nodded. "I'm not paying for water for nothing." 

"You're not paying for water at all." Anders rolled his eyes, letting him slide down and unbuttoning his pants. "Off now." He stripped down, stepping into the water. 

Blake shimmied out of his cargo shorts and climbed in, sidling up to him again. He pulled Anders close and kissed him, nipping at his lip. "Ders." He mumbled. "Ders, come on. Too long." 

"Last night." Anders reminded. 

"Like 8 hours." Blake groaned. "Come on." 

"On what?" 

"Me, stupid. Or- maybe the correct preposition would be in. Dunno. Depends. Whatever you're feeling." 

Anders smiled, picking him up and pressing him against the wall. Blake nestled against his neck, biting his throat and grinding down against him. "Ders, don't tease, I'll cry." 

Anders laughed some, pressing in slowly. "Good?" 

"Yes, I'm not a- uh- a baby." He said quickly, rolling his hips down. "Faster, harder. Something." 

Anders leaned over and bit a mark into his collarbone. 

"You- you fucker. I'm not gonna be able to wear any of those classic unbuttoned shirts like Adam wears all the time- or my sweater vest man. Bitches love the sweater vest." 

"Shut up about bitches while I am literally fucking your ass." Anders whispered, biting his ear. 

"Ugh, say that again." Blake grumbled, his head falling back against the unpressed tile. 

"Stop talking about- bitches." His hips stuttered slightly and he almost fell but slammed Blake back against the shower. "Fuck." 

Blake gasped, squirming on his dick. "Fuckfuckfuck." 

Anders groaned, coming suddenly. "That was ridiculously great." 

Blake whimpered, yanking him close to kiss him as he released. He sighed, letting the water wash over him and clean them both. "Good morning." 

"Good morning." Anders smirked, letting him down. 

"Shit! My bagels, my bagels man. Gotta go." Blake grabbed Anders' shirt and wrapped it around his waist as he raced down the hall. 

Anders rolled his eyes and washed his hair, climbing out minutes later. Good bagels.


End file.
